


Hypothermia - Frozen Heart

by Anonymous



Series: Anon-san’s stories of Haikyuu [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Break Up, Depressed Miya Atsumu, Depression, Emotional Hurt, Hurt, I Don't Even Know, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Mentioned Ushijima Wakatoshi, Miya Atsumu Needs a Hug, Miya Osamu Needs a Hug, Other Ships Not Mentioned in Tags, Pain, Post-Break Up, Protective Miya Osamu, Sad Ending, Sad Miya Atsumu, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:01:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28158723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Atsumu knew the various diseases of the heart, diseases of love. He knew Hanahaki or the starry tears. Atsumu saw random people dying of that. He saw, heard stories, and of course sometimes it was sad, sometimes with luck it was beautiful.But never would Atsumu have thought that he could freeze to death because of lost love.Or, in which to know cold, you have to know warmth. And how his last gentle warmth left him alone in a snowstorm.Or, just a fucking sad fic.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi, Sakusa Kiyoomi/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Series: Anon-san’s stories of Haikyuu [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2062947
Comments: 14
Kudos: 74
Collections: Anonymous





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My first fanfic SakuAtsu posted.
> 
> Now I'm going to hide in a hole where no one will find me.
> 
> Disclaimer.  
> Rated M, because, well, I'm not sure?  
> Fictitious illness, reference to depression, depression, may have died of a major character ?  
> It’s an open ending.  
> No beta, it's written on a whim.  
> My English is terrible, sorry.

_« I’m sorry, it’s not your fault. »_

_« Atsumu, I am sorry. »_

_« Tsumu? »_

* * *

**_« I'm sorry. » He said. « It's not your fault. » He had repeated._ **

At first, he didn't think about it, it wasn't common after all.

At first, it was just a simple shiver, goosebumps and a little warmer skin. At first, he thought it was just a fever.

Atsumu was still trying to recover from the breakup. Although it was difficult when you were working with your ex. The ex, being Sakusa Kiyoomi, of all people. The ex, who didn't seem to care about Atsumu.

But everything was fine because Atsumu and Kiyoomi were professionals after all.

Atsumu was trying to get over it. He was going out with his teammates, visiting his brother, meeting random people around him. ( Semi-san, was a beautiful person, very nice. Terushima-kun could be very cute when he wanted to be. Oikawa-san, even annoying as he was, could be a good company, and he couldn't understand why he never saw him at the national in high school. And contrary to all expectations, he thought Moniwa-san was very cute, and he enjoyed his company. )

Atsumu rarely came home, because it was difficult to call it a home when the person who made it so, warm, gentle and full of life, had left. 

Atsumu doesn't know where he went wrong. What did he miss? Was it not enough? What did he have to do to stay ??

Why?

Atsumu wanted to stop thinking about it. The more he thought about it, the heavier his heart was. And the team was worried because Atsumu seemed to get tired faster. Had he slackened in the meantime? Maybe he had. Atsumu will have to resume his morning routine, waking up at 5 o'clock sounded good to run.

Atsumu was thinking about what he could do after the day, to come home as late as possible and sleep as soon as he got home. But his train of thought was cut when he saw the scene in front of him. Ushijima Watatoshi and Sakusa Kiyoomi, the most popular new couple.

Atsumu does not know if he should be grateful that his relationship with Sakusa has not been official outside of Komori and Osamu. Atsumu doesn't know if he would have wanted the pitying looks of others, he doesn't know if he would have put up with having to pretend that everything is fine when everyone knows that nothing is going well. Who would be okay when you saw your ex in someone else's arms?

Certainly not Atsumu. But Atsumu will get better, otherwise, Osamu would hit him willingly.

But before Atsumu could think about it, the end of the day came, MSBY had lost to Schweiden Adlers, maybe because of the sweet eyes Sakusa was giving Ushijima, or maybe Atsumu was sick.

By the time all the players had finished changing in the locker room, Bokuto had already planned to join Akaashi and Osamu at Miya Onigiri's house. Meian and Barnes would be with their families for the weekend and God knows what Inunaki and Thomas would do together. Tsumu was well annoyed because he knew that Sakusa would be with Ushijima, and only Hinata was his last company, but he had just announced that he would go out with Kageyama tonight, who knows what to do. Atsumu didn't want to know anymore, he was alone at the time and a shiver ran down his spine. He was cold.

So he decided to go straight home, he felt more and more exhausted as time went on. His heart was heavy and it weighed him down.

When he arrived at his door, his vision was blurred. Once inside, it was silence, darkness and cold that kept him company. After taking off his shoes, he didn't bother to change. He went back to bed, under his blankets, shivering.

Atsumu didn't know why, but the last few days were almost freezing.

And it continued day after day. Atsumu couldn't get over it. And no one talked about it. _Maybe_ , Atsumu thought, _maybe they don't care. Maybe I'm not worth it... maybe..._

Then Atsumu cut his thought thread by shaking his head. The wrong movement, on the spot Atsumu thought he was going to fall, then Hinata and Bokuto arrived, exclaiming how much fun they would all have tonight. _Was there an event tonight?_ Atsumu asked.

Then Bokuto answered. « Of course, there was! Omi-kun and Watatoshi made their relationship official! It is necessary to celebrate that! You haven't forgotten, have you? »

**_« Atsumu, I am sorry. » And it kept going round and round in his head. « I'm sorry. » He said._ **

_And Oh! Oh, he had forgotten._ But how many things had he forgotten lately? Atsumu didn't know anymore. _Did I speak aloud?_

« Forgive me Bokkun, it seems that my head is elsewhere these last ones. Hmm, I don't know if I could come, I feel rather sick, I wouldn't want to spoil it for Sakusa-kun. I think I'll call it a night… » 

( « Sakusa-kun? » murmured Hinata and Bokuto in unison. )

Then, without asking any more questions, they nod their heads.

« Take care of yourself, Atsumu-san! » exclaimed Hinata. They said that he would explain his absence to Sakusa, then left.

Then Atsumu's routine resumed, waking up, playing, going home and sleeping.

And one day, when the coach felt that Atsumu was feeling too much, too tired, too slow, too distracted, he sent Atsumu home, telling him not to come back until he felt better, in great shape, he said.

For Atsumu had just missed many tosses, many services, seeming much slower than usual.

So Atsumu, without protest, went home, cold, dark, everyone was shocked.

Atsumu took off all his clothes and put them in the already full laundry basket. Then, dressed in simple underpants, he put himself under his simple, light, shivering blanket.

In his disordered state, his last heat was gone. In front of him, like an angel from heaven, he recognized two dark moles, a tired, judging look, with a voice he would recognize everywhere. _Pitiful._

« O-omi? » murmured Atsumu in a hoarse voice.

_Useless._

« W-what are you talking about? Omi-kun? »

_You are not enough Atsumu, you are never enough. You are only the noisy twin._

« N-no... O-omi-omi... don't go… » 

Softly tears flowed on Atsumu's face, his eyes slowly closed on Sakusa's face. His breathing weakened, his skin was cold and he no longer recognized his environment. He felt himself falling and falling and falling.

It was like falling into a frozen lake, everything was cold, he couldn't feel anything, he couldn't feel his limbs, it was like an eternity as if he was frozen in a block of ice, as if, as if ...

There was nothing but cold.

_In the end, I never got over it, eh, Samu?_

* * *

**_« Tsumu? » whispered a worried voice._ **


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Osamu couldn't believe it, he refused it. He could not die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I finally decided to write a sequel.  
> Osamu chapter.

_ Fuck Sakusa.  _ Was all Osamu could think of _. _

_ Fuck Sakusa and his cold heart. _

_ Fuck Sakusa to leave her brother alone. _

_ Fuck Sakusa for not visiting her dying ex. _

_ Fuck Sakusa. Fuck, fuck and fuck _ .

Osamu thinks, somehow, that he knew something would happen. What Osamu didn't imagine was having to keep his comatose brother company. In a hospital room, white, cold, with only the lifeless noise of the machines that kept his brother alive as his only company.

It had been almost a month since then. A month since Hinata and Bokuto had reported Atsumu's strange behaviour. One month since he found his brother almost dead cold.

_ After Bokuto's call, Osamu had gone to Tsumu's apartment when Tsumu didn't answer his messages and calls. _

_ Osamu doesn't think he has ever been so worried about his brother. _

_ And it is the silence when he enters Atsumu's apartment that slays him. _

_ « Tsumu? » _

_ He had never seen the apartment so empty of life. It was cold, and the silence was destroying. _

_ When he arrived in Tsumu's room, what he saw killed him. Tsumu was lying there, lifeless. His breathing was weak. _

_ « Tsumu? » He whispered as he approached. Slowly he put his hand on his brother's neck, fear overcame him. _

_ And it was cold. Osamu doesn't think he ever hated the cold as much as he did at that moment. _

_ All that kept him sane was Atsumu's weak pulse, weak but still there. _

  
  


If it wasn't for staying by his brother's side right now, Samu swears that Sakusa is somewhere dying without the world knowing it.

  
  


He had vaguely understood what Atsumu had. The doctor had explained. Frozen Heart Disease. A rare disease of unrequited love. Very rare. Rare enough to have so few solutions against the disease.

There was surgery available, but the doctor was clear, anyone who had had surgery had eternally cold skin.

And if Osamu was honest with himself, he would say out loud that he wished Atsumu had Hanahaki. Seeing him forget Sakusa made him happy. Osamu had never really agreed to this relationship. But Osamu knows that even then it would have been hard to convince Tsumu to do the surgery. 

For Tsumu was not Tsumu without love. After all, Atsumu was the very embodiment of love. Sweet, smiling and passionate. Full of love for the world and little for himself.

Osamu could not imagine his brother without love, his cold brother, eyes without warmth, without that golden affection shining like the sun when he woke up. It was impossible for him to see his brother without a smile reaching his eyes, no words exclaiming for his love of volleyball. An Atsumu who did not come to bother Osamu voluntarily was not Atsumu.

It was therefore impossible for Osamu to proceed with an operation to wake up Atsumu, it was out of the question.

And even though Atsumu was a kid, a thief and a liar, even though it looked like Osamu hated Atsumu, Atsumu remained Osamu's brother, his twin, the person with whom he shared almost everything in his life, Atsumu was half of Osamu and Osamu refused to lose Atsumu. He had already almost lost him after high school, he wouldn't let him go a second time.

Osamu would do anything, absolutely anything, to wake up his brother. No matter how long it takes, no matter what means are used, no matter if Osamu ends up losing his whole life, he will wake up Atsumu.

He pledges it.

( After all, there was at least one person who had managed to wake up without surgery because of a mother's love. Osamu could do it. He will. )

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My SakuAtsu angst come to be a Miya Twins angst :)  
> My bad, now, I don't know how to write the sequel with Sakusa...

**Author's Note:**

> Look, I'm really sorry, and oh my God, it sounds so incorrect...  
> Here are the notes on the Atsumu disease, it's still a draft, that's why I leave an open-end (and also because I don't want to finish it because I might cry).  
> To say that I created this disease on the spot without really thinking about it, after having read so many break-up stories.
> 
> Hypothermia disease (or frozen heart disease, I don't know what to name this) :  
> \- Only after the break, because you have to know the heat to know the cold.  
> \- Like so-called normal hypothermia, frozen heart disease occurs in 3 stages, mild, moderate, severe, which goes from a chill to death, passing through a coma.  
> \- Unlike normal hypothermia, the skin temperature is hot and the internal temperature slowly drops, it makes the heart heavy. Sometimes the skin may even be warmer than normal, such as when you have a fever. The skin temperature started to drop only when the internal temperature was below 35-32 ° C.  
> \- If we don't (medically) help the coma patient then death is sure.  
> Medical treatment of hypothermia to keep the patient alive is like normal hypothermia treatment. The patient resists in a coma because the heart is said to be frozen.  
> \- Definitive treatment, medically, we do an operation of the heart. The patient wakes up but loses all heat. (# loss of love.)  
> \- Definitive treatment, alternatively, give the patient sufficient heat. That is to say, give the love that the patient needs to wake up (the best is to do it before the coma, otherwise the treatment takes longer (the best love to give is family love (preferably close, parents and brother and sister) and romantic love)). Usually, this treatment works best if the love after the breakup comes back (which is rare). This treatment is much more difficult if the patient has self-esteem issues.  
> \- Frozen heart disease is still a rare disease, the love in the couple must be strong enough that when there is a breakup there is a huge difference between heat and cold.  
> \- I think that's all ?
> 
> Omg, why I wrote this?
> 
> ~ Anon-san ~ Just a shy guy.


End file.
